Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder...

     Remember that old adage? Well, as I grow older and have a bit more time to ponder such things, I would agree heartily with the sentiment. My wife and I have a combined family of five children, eight grandchildren, and three great grandchildren. We now live in Tradition, Florida and our kids and their families are spread out far and wide across this great country. Our oldest son and family of four lives near San Diego, our middle son and family of four lives in Connecticut and our youngest son and family of four lives on the west coast of Florida (about three hours from us). Our oldest daughter and family of four  lives on the east coast of Florida (approximately and hour and fifteen minutes away) and out youngest daughter and her husband lives (right now, they are an army family on the move) in Virginia, soon to be Kansas. We also have two grandkids in Florida nearby our youngest son and one grandchild in Connecticut near our second oldest son. My sister and her family lives in Vermont and Maine and my wife's sister and family lives in California. 

     There's the proverbial rub. It's impossible to see them all in a given year, at least for two educators who live mostly on social security and pensions. So, we keep in touch with text messages, cards, phone calls, gifts sent in the mail, fantasy football, and spend a good deal of time thinking about each of them. Seventy-five years ago, families pretty much stayed in their same 'neck of the woods', just like you see in The Falls community in my mystery series. Back then, most people earned money by doing whatever they could find and they often settled down and made it their life's work. Now days, with all the technology and instant availability to be anywhere at anytime, our sons and daughters go to where the best jobs are. Rightfully so. But, in any case, families are no longer living a few miles from each other. They're lucky if they live a few states from one another.

     I would pull any punches. I miss being around our kids. Each one of them is. in their own ways, special. I miss having time to joke around and hang around with them. I miss their laughter, their teasing, their intelligence, their inner strength and their caring. I miss watching them grow older and better...I even miss noticing the gray hair and the extra pounds that inevitably come and I'm shocked to see when we visit. I miss watching them be around with their kids. They are all great parents, or will be someday. I would give anything to have a crystal ball and just watch them whenever I get a little wistful or have that insatiable urge to reconnect. I really miss family holidays at our house. I miss the gatherings where we all were part of a bigger whole. That was special, and I know it never will be the same again.

     But I also know that just as my wife and I were in our thirties and forties (and starting into their fifties soon), our kids are working all hours of the day, taking their kids off to soccer and t-ball practice, keeping up their houses and busily carving out their own lives and traditions. I get it, I understand. But that doesn't mean that I have to like it. I'm six feet two and a good two hundred and thirty pounds, but in the end, I guess I'm a sentimental old Yankee Scotsman, who loves his kids, their kids and their kids. I would give anything to have us all together for a week. Family reunion style. I can close my eyes and envision all the laughing and squabbling and talking and camaraderie. All the love and remembering who we are and where we came from. Then it could all go back to the way it is. How perfect would that be?

     So, does absence make your heart grow fonder?

     May the dragons watch over you... 

Fall Means Football...

     There are many ways for a family to have fun. Snowball fights, days at the beach, hiking in the mountains, playing games, cookouts, holiday get-togethers, laughing so hard you can't stand up and just being together all ring a bell. But there are other, more diverse ways as well.

     You see, I have an alter ego. (Well, probably I have several, but then who doesn't?!) Eons before I had a blog, years before I published my first ebook, distant ages before I learned how to create an e-cover, I was an NFL football fan and the commissioner of two fantasy football leagues.

     In 1958, when I was eleven, I watched my first NFL game. It was magical. It was on a small, six inch square, fuzzy-screened floor model TV that weighed probably more than an offensive lineman. Most of the time the test pattern was on, because there weren't enough shows to fill out a schedule at that time. It was the Sudden Death game, where the Baltimore Colts beat the New York Giants in overtime. Johnny Unitas, Alan Ameche, Gino Marchetti, Lenny Moore and all their teammates pounded the ball into the end zone before my amazed and astonished eyes. From that time on, I was a Colts' fan, never wavering an inch over the next fifty-four years.

     I have faithfully followed my Colts through Super Bowl years, and through years where winning one or two games was a stretch of the imagination. But no matter their record, no matter how good or how lousy and pitiful they were, they were my team and I was, and am, proud of them. 

     As the years went by, my wife became an ardent Seattle Seahawks fan, and our three sons morphed into a Chargers' fan a Bears' fan, and a Raider fan. (Don't ask me where they got those teams from! Each has a different and fascinating story.) I also started playing fantasy football decades ago. I enjoyed playing it a great deal but something was missing. So, finally, I decided to run two family (and a few close friends) fantasy leagues. That was more like it! We could play against each other, no matter where we were in the country, and enjoy the teasing, the excitement, the trash talk and the camaraderie of the moment.

     My wife got involved in it a few years ago, and has become quite proficient! In fact, last year, she won both leagues! That's a pretty cool thing for a mom and grandma to hold over her kids and grandkids (Just think of it... Hey! My grandmother just beat me at fantasy football!) I'm quite proud of her and have enjoyed watching all of our family members who participate interact and enjoy the moments we share. It's a way to come together as the miles and states between us suddenly vanish.

     You'll notice that several of the characters in The Falls small town mysteries have football teams and baseball teams they root for as well. That's an integral part of small town life as well. Friends running out the flags of their favorite teams on Saturday or Sunday and beeping their horns at others as they pass. Small town America at it's best!

     So, you see, for me fall is much more than just beautiful foliage, apple-picking and the first cold breeze signaling that winter is upon us. It's football, family and fun. What does your family do for fun? 

     May the dragons watch over your favorite team this weekend...

Break-in Plus Six Days...

     Well, it's been a rather crazy six days since our home was broken into while we were in New England. Twenty-six hours after we got the message from the security company, our contractor and the police, we drove in our driveway. Since then, I actually haven't left my yard. I'm waiting for the new french doors with high intensity glass to be installed. We have our metal hurricane shutters bolted on over the broken sliding glass door but somehow, it makes me just a tad nervous. 

     We have talked to three insurance people, an insurance adjuster, three police women, had our fingerprints taken, and written out a five page description of what was taken. We're waiting for someone from the city building inspector's office to come by and check our new screened in porch (which we have to go outside to go into, since it is on the other side of the broken slider). We are also waiting for our contractor, who was wonderful through the whole process, to order and install our white french doors. When that happens, and we install motion detectors, it will be a relief.

     My wife and I have talked to each other, at the oddest of moments, about how we feel about the whole circus. Mostly in a sentence or two at a time, with an accompanying hug and a shake of the head. It's funny what emotions flow through you as you recover from the whole thing. It almost seems as though it happened to someone else, although as you clean up the black dust from fingerprints taken, the bits of things that were destroyed by the culprits and as both of you try and do things to make sure that it never happens again, you know it's real. We have also spoken to, texted and emailed a variety of family and friends, letting them know what has happened. Their kind, thoughtful, heartfelt, and at times, emotional sentiments, are both good to hear and sustaining.

     As with most of life, this incident will make us stronger. It sharpens our empathy to those who have lost much more than us, and someday, a long way off, it will bring us peace. To those of you who have been so caring...Thank you. To those of you who read this, become thoughtful and wonder about what the world is coming to...the world still has such a great deal of beauty, wonder and magic...don't be afraid. Live life to it's fullest...and enjoy each and every day you have. Love, laugh, and savor fully those that you love and cherish. Don't waste a moment.

     May the dragons watch over all of you...(and may they char the a**** of those who deserve it...)

     

Why do you write?

     Have you ever stopped and thought why you write, or what makes writers write? I will admit that over the years, I haven't really given it much too much thought. While I was working 12-13 hours a day as a principal, there were always dozens of other things to occupy my thoughts. Since I have been "retired" I write every morning and edit every afternoon (at least every day I'm home and don't have an appointment or company) so again, my thoughts are used in other pursuits. But we had occasion to drive up and back from Florida to Vermont and Connecticut recently to visit my sister and our second oldest son. During those long hours driving or riding, when we weren't searching for foliage or checking the GPS and how it differed from the AAA maps, I settled in on the question at hand. Why do I write?

     The basic answer is this: I guess I write because I have to. There is this certain something inside me that drives me, urges me, propels me to put words down on paper...to tell stories. That's what I think of it as...telling stories. I can remember sitting out on the farmhouse porch of my little grandma, eating fresh raspberries or blueberries, covered with sugar and sitting in milk while the fireflies fluttered aimlessly and listening to her tell me about "the olden days". To her, the olden days meant the days of her youth. She told those stories with such a passionate twinkle in her eye and a grin on her wizened face that as I sat, the sunset stretching across the green mountains, I could actually envision what she was describing.

     Later on, when I was in school and it was story time, when our teachers would read from the world of books like Gulliver's Travels by Jonathan Swift or The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.H. Lewis or the Tales of King Arthur, I would sit quietly with my head down and see the story as the teacher magically wove it. (I will readily admit to having wonderful teachers, all who could capture their whole class with their dramatic renditions from the classics. I was lucky...today's rigid and unrealistic testing schedules leave little time for what is really important like reading to the class.)

     Then, as I grew up, I began creating my own worlds and stories, playing them out in the backyard, or weaving them to myself. My sister was eleven years older than I, so I got to babysit (actually it was more like playing with them) her kids at times. I created magical worlds for them out of our basement, taking them in a spaceship to the moon, or creating a pirate's ship to sail the seven seas! We spent countless hours imagining, laughing and playing. When my children came along, I read to them every night, or told them stories that I eagerly spun on the fly when they asked me for them, which was often. They seemed to love my little stories more than the stories I read to them from books.

     So, I write because the stories have to get out. I write because I want to share the stories with others. I write because I truly love to write. I make use of what I have heard and seen and lived with all of my life. I write because I miss writing when I'm not. I know it's not for fame or money or to "be somebody" all though that would be amazing if it ever happens. But most of all, I write because I simply have to. The stories have a life of their own and I am the simple conduit who writes them down, gets them out so they can be shared. It feels good to write (not to edit or do all the other stuff, that gets a bit tedious). 

     Why do you think your favorite authors write? Why do you write? Do you find that you have to write  as well?

     May the dragons watch over you and the stories in your heart, head and soul...

The Six Most Important Words in a Relationship...

     I was listening to several people a while ago. They were talking about what were the most important words we could say in our lives. They happened to be dealing with what six words they felt were the most important. (I later learned that they had been discussing an episode of the Michael J. Fox show!) Now, there are obviously lots of words that are important in relationships. And we have a wide range of relationships with all kinds of friends, family, co-workers, acquaintances, spouses and soul mates. There are lots of words that are specifically fine-tuned to each one of those relationships. So their random conversation got me to thinking.

     At first, I thought that the six words, "I love you with all my heart" were the most important ones. But, those six words, although the strongest and most meaningful in certain situations, don't seem quite appropriate when you're returning an overdue book to Mrs. McAllister the librarian, or when you're politely asking little Tommy Sedgwick from down the street to get his bike out of your yard. "You mean the world to me" has the same narrow focus. Powerful words but they can be used inappropriately. "I am so proud of you" fits the broad overall spectrum of people and circumstances a good deal better. "I am so happy with you" does as well. But, after much thought about the options and possibilities, I have decided on what I feel are the best six words, when needed, we can use for all occasions and everyone in our lives.

     I agree with the writers from the Michael J. Fox show. The words are:  "I'm wrong. You're right. I'm sorry."

     Sorry about the contractions, but technically it's still six words. The phrase seems to fit. It shows that we are able to admit and verbalize that someone else has a better idea than we do or a better way of doing things, and that we are kind and caring enough to acknowledge that fact. It shows that we have faith and a belief in that person and that we are humble enough to say we're sorry. That means a lot. Hearing someone else say it to you makes one stop and listen carefully, doesn't it? We don't really hear it that often, you'll notice. When we do it means something special. Saying you're sorry is very hard for a lot of us. Doing so, in a quiet, thoughtful and loving way can be the ultimate act of giving. Even when said in supplication, the words hit the right note. You can't go too far wrong when saying and meaning the six words.

     So, those are the six words I believe do the job. What do you think? What six words do you think are most important?

     May the dragons watch over you...and if not, I'm wrong, you're right and I'm sorry!

Positive Attitudes and Life...

     Over the past 65 years there have been a lot of ups and downs in my life. Hopefully, I have learned from each of them. One thing I'm sure of: the way you react to the events and people in your life make a difference in the direction your life heads from that point onward.

     Each of us has a wide range of incidents that come our way. There are times that we are more positive than negative about the way we respond to them, and vice-versa. The first twenty-some-odd years, I think the way most of us respond to those incidents are mostly reactive and formed without much thought, responding with our 'gut feelings' if you will. After that, at a point in time that varies widely for each of us, we begin stepping back after the initial shock or rejoicing of a particular incident and figuring out the best way to handle it. We begin to take stock of what has happened, how it affects the ones closest to us and evaluate the options it affords us.

     I'll be the first to admit that there are times I have completely blown how to handle something, and other times that I have done it in a fashion that I'm proud of, even to this day. One thing I have learned: I need to remember that unless it's life or death circumstances, whatever the incident, it will gradually assimilate into my life. So, I have come to take a much more positive tack and have tried to be kind, openminded and understanding. Okay, that hasn't always worked. I'm still a feisty, independent Scotsman and I tend to fire up my personal dragons if someone or something deliberately "rains on my parade". But now, instead of responding, I count to ten (okay, maybe twenty-five) before I respond like a wild-eyed Scottish Highlander, even though I might prefer that method at the moment. If I'm honest, I have to admit that I often envision myself aggressively confronting the offending person or event, which does help somewhat! Beheading with a Scottish Claymore is particularly rewarding!

     I think after five wonderful kids, eight beautiful grandchildren and three special great grand-babies, I have mellowed. I'm sure some of my friends from younger days are chuckling over that statement, but I have. I have come to look at an incident or an idiotic, belligerent person with different, hopefully wiser, eyes. It doesn't mean I'm weaker...it means I have more skill in dealing with the world. Most difficult things in life are not worth the stress and emotional wear and tear. (My wife, I'm sure, is chuckling and asking, "George? That can't be you! Who are you and what have you done with my husband?")

     All of us have moments when we wished we would have handled a situation better. I have less of those as I grow older and become an elder statesman. As a principal of several schools over twenty-nine years (forty years in education as a teacher and administrator) I used my skills and my wits. There were times I told people off, but they had to really deserve it. In my own personal life, however, I was more emotional, more instantaneous reaction. Sometimes that was good, sometimes it wasn't. I think we have to see what our actions do to those we love and care about to really get to the point where rationalization, calmness and understanding are the watchword we go by.

     How about you? Are you emotional or rational? Positive or negative? How do you react to life's little events? And how does that reaction make you feel?

     May the dragons watch over you...

Ten Day Adventure???

     My wife and I have just returned from a ten day road trip to Vermont, Connecticut and parts north. We went up to spend time with my sister who had recently had a a serious procedure. We also went to enjoy helping my sister and her husband set up and take down their art tent and display at Art in the Park in Rutland, Vermont. My sister is a very famous oil and watercolor artist in New England, Ann McFarren. (In fact the character Louise May McFadden in my Falls small town mystery series is modeled after her.) Art in the Park is a time tested art and craft show held once in the spring and once in the fall around the town square in Rutland. (Check out Art in the Park, Rutland). We had a great time. The foliage was almost in peak season and we got to see and enjoy lots of family.

     From there, we headed down to Coventry, CN where our son and his wife live. We spent a couple of wonderful days with them on our way back home to Tradition, Florida. We also had a had a wonderful time with them and our grandson.

     And so our adventure took us 1500 miles up and fifteen hundred miles back. The first fifteen hundred miles was done in a rather leisurely fashion in two and a half days staying at two Hampton Inns, our hotel of choice. The return trek was done in a little over twenty-six hours with only gas and potty breaks. This second, hurried trip was necessary because we got a phone call from the police and out security company telling us that our home had been broken into!

     Needless to say, we had all kinds of awful thoughts as we made out way back home. Luckily, the contractor we had hired to add an outside, screened in patio deck complete with pavers arrived just after the thieves had broken our sliding glass door window and were ransacking our house. When the contractor called out to us, thinking we were home early, the surprised thieves jumped out the bedroom window. When we finally did arrive home this morning, we found that several things had been gathered by the sliding glass door to take with the thieves. Fortunately, they were only able to abscond with some of my good jewelry (from an earlier life as a school principal).

     Apparently, the people who broke and entered our house are known as the "pillowcase" bandits in the area, because they enter a home with nothing and carry out easily sold and valuable items in a pillowcase stolen from the house. Okay...let's be honest...after the anger and shock died down a bit (my thoughts included having five minutes alone with the miscreants to inflict massive damage!), I began to have a distinct yen to include these bandits in one of my The Falls small town mystery series! You heard it here first! Watch for it! Strange what a writer's brain focuses on, isn't it?!

     During the day, we talked to our insurance agent, met with the police who had dusted for prints and were following up leads, along with talking with some neighbors who were very helpful and thanking our contractor heartily. After two days without sleep we took an hour and a half nap...but that hardly made a dent in the weariness.

     So, our adventure is over, except for the cleaning up, filling out police and insurance forms and wondering if the dastardly hoodlums will ever decide to return. Now we'll look at increased security matters and staying close to home for awhile. I will put the dragons on high alert (they love to singe the a**es of nefarious characters!) as well.

     May your day have been much better than ours...

Write What You Know...

     It seems like the number one piece of advice that people give about writing is simply this: you should write about what you know. Thanks goodness that fantasy authors like Tolkien, McCaffrey and King didn't follow that advice. Hmmm, on second thought, maybe they did write what they knew. In their case, however, it was what they saw, envisioned and were familiar with inside their own creative minds.

     In my own case, I grew up in Vermont. A small town outside of Rutland, Fair Haven to be exact. I saw a number of old time Vermonters as I grew up in the fifties and sixties. I was familiar with the lush green mountains surrounding every town, farm and hamlet. I lived through winters where six feet of snow in one storm or temperatures far below zero were commonplace. I fished in the myriad of small lakes and streams as well as in Lake Champlain. (By the way, Lake Champlain is about 500 feet deep in the middle and has it's own Loch Ness monster nicknamed Champ. That's where Squashy of Lake Pumpkinseed lore came from!)

     I grew up around independent, feisty, crotchety and direct speaking Vermonters. I believe that strong, intelligent and determined women were the norm back then as well. My ancestors were farmers and loggers. I was raised by a gentile, intelligent but stubborn teacher, my mother, and a kind, funny, inventive and skillful man, my father. My sister was eleven years older than me. She was my babysitter...and that relationship didn't change to us being friends until we were adults. I only have misty memories of one grandfather, but I remember both my grandmothers very vividly. The character traits from both parents and grandparents have been used a number of times in The Falls small town mysteries.

     I write about a town that has fifties and sixties values, ethics and relationships, because it is what I value most about my birthplace. The small town in my stories is a place that I find solace in, a place apart from the hustle, bustle and often callous and insensitive world we now live in. It also is a town that combines both the best of modern technology and the reminders of an older, slower paced but more caring world world (like the two-way radios that the sheriff's department uses, and the hand printed menus at Tina's Diner).

     So, in the end, in The Falls small town mysteries, I write about what I know.

     Of course, that doesn't give you any reasonable explanation about the World of Rupar, Dragon World! Dragon World is all mine, a world of rugged landscapes, lusty, fierce and passionate warriors, wizards and barbarians. They are my escape from the modern, 'there's a rule for everything' world. There, courage, honor, strength, fierce dedication and loyalty hold sway above all else. It is the world where I go to think bigger than life as the powers of good wars against evil, in all its forms.

     So, in the end I, as an author do both. I write about what I know, and I write about what I dream. What do you do?

Where do your characters come from?

     That's the most frequently asked question I get about my stories. "Where did the characters come from? Are they people you've met, or people you see in the news, or are they composites of lots of folks?"

     As my little (4'10") grandma used to tell me with a wink, the answer is complicated. Some characters are much like people I've known, either physically or emotionally or simply the way they think about things. I used to know an old man back in Vermont who was as direct as a straight line, and he never spoke more than five words in any one sentence. Blunt, to the point and unvarnished. I've used him a lot. Old time Vermonters are much like that. Darlene Pitts, the sheriff's secretary and dispatcher and Alma Stewart, the secretary at the town hall, have a lot of that old man in them.

     Most of the characters I see in my head. No, don't get Dr. Serafina Messina the town psychiatrist to come and see me. I imagine them, I really don't think they're real. And (ahem) if I did think they were real, I wouldn't be telling you...or her. Like Jebediah Smith and Ezekiel Peters. I can see Jeb and Zeke as clear as if they were standing here next to me playing a video game. Well, they are the town's premier connoisseurs of video games, owning the Smith and Peters Super Video Store, so what would be far-fetched about that? By the way, have you noticed that when you see a scene with Jeb and Zeke playing a video game that it always has something to do with the plot of the story? Check it out.

     Other characters, like the Dragonriders, barbarians and wizards in Dragon World come from the rich imagination I developed reading The Hobbit, Anne McCaffrey and their amazing colleagues. I have to admit, I love a lot of the Young Adult novels right now. Great writing, rich, marvelously creative characters and intense plots. So with the characters in the wild, rugged world of Rupar, I plugged in the qualities I most wanted each of them to have and gave them all a fierce, fiesty edge. After all, they are larger than life and heroes or master villains, for Heaven's sake!

     The main characters in The Falls, (lean a bit closer, I don't want to say this too loud, it's a secret), come from myself, my close friends or my relatives. I see myself in several characters...bits and pieces of me you understand. I see my kids, my wife, my sister...and a number of people who I know well. I won't tell you which ones are which, that would be like giving away the ingredients to a prize-winning chili. But if you look hard enough, you should begin to figure it out.

     So, for those of you that are writers, I ask you: where do your characters come from?

     May the dragons watch over you...

Free Promotion!!!

     The Falls: Trial, the 10th volume in The Falls small town mystery series will be on free promotion at the Kindle Store, Amazon.com this Friday, Saturday and Sunday! Don't forget to grab a copy while it's free! The 12th volume of the series, The Falls: Revenge, will be out in a few weeks! Return to The Falls!

http://www.amazon.com/Falls-Trial-small-mystery-ebook/dp/B00D0BTZ3E/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1380807568&sr=1-1&keywords=The+Falls%3A+Trial

Government Shutdown

       I understand that the congressmen and women we have elected to watch over us and do what's right for us have decided to do nothing while America goes, as my father would say, "to hell in a hand basket".   

     With all due respect, I believe the country would be much better served if during that time, all of those smug, self-important lawmakers were to lose their paychecks, have their insurance revoked and be placed in the beginnings of bankruptcy. It's my humble opinion that the crisis would be solved within a day if that were to happen. 

     Of course that would mean the republicans and democrats would actually have to talk to each other instead of posturing, boasting and showing us dramatically how "much they care". Our trusted congressmen and women need to start remembering why America is called the land of the brave and the home of the free, and why we are still the greatest country in the world before we rise up as a people, take back their jobs and wish them well anywhere but 'serving us' in the government  

     Why is it that politicians can't see the forest for the trees? It's such a shame. It's time to put America's future ahead of any tough times we might need to go through to get us where we need to be. I wonder how many people agree with me out there?